Sicut Cervus Desiderat

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

2019 Christmas Letter

2019 Advent Letter by Patty Lawson on Scribd

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

Regarding VT Bill HB57

Dear Legislators and fellow Vermont citizens,

I write as a former fertilized egg, embryo, fetus and child. I write as the product of an inconvenient pregnancy to an unwed mother. I write as a mother, one who has carried each stage of pregnancy within my body and despite hardships, welcomed my children into the world. I write as one who makes choices each day that affects the welfare of others and realizes that my choices have consequences not only for myself, but for others and I make better choices when I research my options and have access to resources that help me learn more

I am in awe at what little I know of the advances being made in science. I have read that they have DNA tests that can identify your parents, siblings, and distant relatives. I am amazed that we can look at a cell and see that every cell in our body is unique to us and that ½ of our DNA strand comes from each of our parents. From the moment of fertilization, a new, unique unrepeatable cell line is created that will culminate in a unique unrepeatable living person and every cell in that person belongs singularly to that person. We know that a child’s heart beats only 22 days after conception and that a child born at only 22 weeks gestation can survive outside the womb. It is amazing to me that the more we know through science about life, the less our society will acknowledge to be true when it comes to nascent human life.

. Under HB 57, as written, a mother may choose “whether to give birth to a child or have an abortion.”[1] When I look at this wording, I have to ask – “ Is a child only a child if a mother deems it to be child-worthy? At what point is the new life in the mother considered a child – only when it is wanted?” If this law is truly about choice – should there not also be information and support for the mother who desires to give birth to her child but needs the support of her community to make this decision. What of the woman who desires to keep her child but the father will not pay to support the child but offers to pay for an abortion? The law speaks about choice then only allows for unrestricted abortion – giving no options for adoption or child support.

In the legislature at this time, I read that there is also a bill in process to protect lab rats from experimentation that will allow them more rights that a human fetus. There are no safeguards in HB 57 against the selling of the aborted fetus for scientific research, unrestricted abortion could lead to the trafficking in human cell lines for research. HB 57, needs to have some protection to avoid the abortion of children for the purpose of scientific experimentation – no one should profit financially from the death of a human embryo or fetus or child. Under HB 57, the “A fertilized egg, embryo, or fetus” will have no rights at all under Vermont law. This goes way beyond current abortion laws set on Roe v. Wade and does not allow a mother whose unborn child is killed in a DUI accident to have recourse for the child she has lost. What of an unborn child killed in an attack upon it’s mother? This law does not have protection for a child that is born alive when the mother intended to abort it – do we then allow the living, born child to die? Is this really what Vermont wants to be known for – a state that has kills it’s children with the most liberal abortion laws in the world? I have read Art Wolf’s economics columns where he comments on the declining population in Vermont – as it is, our declining birth rate does not bode well economically for our state – this legislation will not help to improve our population or economic situation.

I am grateful that my mother chose life for me despite the hardships she faced when I was most vulnerable, I feel duty bound to speak for others who are also in this vulnerable position and relying upon their mothers to nourish the life that has begun within their womb. Each of us owes a debt to our mothers who chose to give us life, can we not give our own children this basic right? Please do not allow this bill to become law – rather, let us create a bill that will support life from conception until birth and also support the woman and her child.

[1] “(b) Every individual who becomes pregnant has the fundamental right to 16 choose to carry a pregnancy to term, give birth to a child, or to have an 17 abortion. 18

Friday, December 21, 2018

2018 Advent & Christmas Letter

2018 Advent and Christmas L... by on Scribd

You can also click here to see our Christmas e-card.

Thursday, June 14, 2018

A link to A Motherhood Reflection

For Posterity, here is a link to an article I was interviewed for:
https://www.vermontcatholic.org/vermont/joy-of-motherhood/

Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Who will be a Witness?

I was asked to give a witness talk at our Parish's "Encounter" an evening of prayer and adoration. I thought I might also share it on-line for anyone who would like to read it. Praise the Lord for His many blessings!

A Reflection on the Transforming Power of Eucharistic Love

using Psalms 84 and 42

How lovely your dwelling,

O LORD of hosts!^a

My soul yearns and pines

for the courts of the LORD.^b (Psalm 84:1-3)

I grew up the oldest of 10 children in a loving Catholic family in San Diego. My parents gave me the gift of life and of faith; the Catholic faith has always been an important part of my life. Yet I grew up confused – what does it mean to be Catholic? There seemed to be so many conflicting ideas and expressions of faith and I wondered – how does one recognize the Truth? So many voices call away from the practice of faith; Why be different? Why not follow the culture and live for the present moment? The Lord called to me in whispers that I needed to learn to listen to and yet my whole being yearned for the message He had for me.

As the deer longs for streams of water,^a

so my soul longs for you, O God.

3My soul thirsts for God, the living God.

When can I enter and see the face of God?^*^b

4My tears have been my bread day and night,^c

as they ask me every day, “Where is your God?”^d (Psalm 42:1-4)

I was not particularly faithful in prayer but God hears even feeble prayers. I was accepted to a beautiful Catholic Liberal Arts College in New Hampshire. Students were encouraged to attend daily Mass, a new experience for me at the time. We were expected to be in the Church at least 15 minutes early to prepare for Mass. On my first day of classes, a zealous upper classman adopted me and we arrived about 30 minutes early for Mass. That extra 30 minutes of quiet time with “nothing” to do except sit there was torture. I did not know how to listen and found it extremely uncomfortable to sit still for so long. But Love is patient and over time Jesus taught me to sit quietly and listen so I could hear His voice and I came to love that quiet preparation time before Mass – it was a place of peace amongst the challenges, uncertainties and growing pains I faced as a student in College.

4^*As the sparrow finds a home

and the swallow a nest to settle her young,

My home is by your altars,

LORD of hosts, my king and my God!^c

5Blessed are those who dwell in your house!

They never cease to praise you. (Psalm 84:4-5)

In the Eucharist Jesus – the Word Made Flesh - is Hidden Love, present, waiting for that moment when we are able to calm the clamor within us and hearken to His voice. He was literally there for me 24/7 while I was in College. In our dorm near the entrance we had a small chapel with the Eucharist. At first, I would pass by with just a simple sign of the Cross; there was so much to do as a student! Yet, daily He called me. I could not pass by. I was compelled to stay. When I went home for Christmas, I missed living under the same roof with Jesus and so adopted the practice of stopping by the perpetual adoration chapel whenever I was in the area. In adoration, in those quiet moments before the Lord, often reflecting upon His Word, I have found peace and the answer to so many questions.

6Blessed the man who finds refuge in you,

in their hearts are pilgrim roads.

(Psalm 84:6)

Since it is almost impossible to spend time with Jesus without being introduced to his Mother, I have also found Mary’s loving guidance indispensible in my desire to know her Son more fully. Mary’s life so fully reflects Christ that whenever we draw near to her we experience Christ’s love and her yes gives us the Way to be fully ourselves as God meant us to be, living His life of Love.

I can concretely credit Jesus present in the Eucharist and His Blessed Mother with my first Job out of college – my dream job as a kindergarten teacher at a Catholic School (named Sierra Madre in honor of Mary); the call to go deeper and study theology through Ave Maria University & St. Mary’s Institute for Pastoral Theology; the job that supported me through graduate school: I was offered the perfect job right after leaving the adoration chapel to work for the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist in their schools; my vocation to marriage– I actually met my husband for the first time in the adoration chapel at Christ the King Parish after corresponding on-line through “Ave Maria Singles” and my husband proposed to me in an adoration chapel at St. Mary’s Church.

Time before the Eucharist is the well-spring that nourished my young adult life and has been the source of peace and strength in the challenges I face daily in my vocation as a wife and mother. Jesus has guided me through every challenge as I left the home of my youth (with its beautiful weather), my family, and friends. When Phil was discerning the diaconate, it was prayer before the Eucharist that helped us trust completely in God’s plan for our family – even when it meant moving, packing and living in 5 homes over the space of 1 year while welcoming our 4^th child to our family. Each step of the way God has blessed me and my family and our Blessed Mother has guided us in our desire to say Yes to God’s plan.

11Better one day in your courts

than a thousand elsewhere.

(Psalm 84:11)

I have experienced God’s love abundantly even when I have had to leave behind things I thought I could not live without (like everything except the bare essentials when we first moved to MI). When I trust all the little details that I would otherwise have to worry about to Him my anxiety and fear of the future melt away. He has been with me every step of the way when the various Crosses – difficult pregnancies, challenges with homeschooling my children, trying to find a quiet moment to write down my thoughts for this reflection– have loomed before me. God has enriched my life beyond my wildest dreams and fulfilled my every heart’s desire. How grateful I am for my vocation to Marriage and the gift of Dcn. Phil’s love; our six sweet children, Phil’s vocation to the diaconate and a job he loves, our beautiful home and this Parish community where we are able to attend daily Mass only 5 minutes from home and be nourished in our faith. I marvel at the many gifts God has showered upon me since those lonely confused adolescent years when I did know what I should do and life felt overwhelming as I questioned what it meant to be Catholic – I had to learn to trust God as the loving Father that He is and to know that He will always guide me and help me along the path that is best for me. God delights in us as a Mother does her child, smiling when we take our toddling steps in faith, if we go astray he rejoices when we return to Him and He encourages us to become stronger until we can join Him in His life of Love which culminates in the Crucifixion and Resurrection.

My Life has been blessed and made more fruitful by Our Lord present in the Eucharist and by following Mary’s gentle Guiding hand and I truly believe that nothing is more valuable than time spent with Him. My prayer is that we may we always trust in God’s plan for us and that we may bring His love to those we meet!

The LORD withholds no good thing

from those who walk without reproach.

13O LORD of hosts,

blessed the man who trusts in you! (Psalm 84:12b-13)